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Idea Cafe's CyberSchmooz
Financial Feasts

Financing message forum where you can get and give insights found nowhere else. Belly up to the table and request funding. Or tell your money tales. Any money talk is fair game except ads.

The Latest Hot Topics:

Show Me the Money!
Belly up to the Financial Feasts table and talk turkey about money... what to look for, where & how? All money talk is fair game. Go


Getting Ready Emotionally

Financial nuts and bolts, like learning how to do a profit-and-loss statement or devising a marketing strategy, are challenging. But the really hard stuff is inside. Like fears of failing. Or feeling you are totally alone and nobody can understand the pressure you're under. Or a perfectionistic streak that tells you if you can't get the perfect money deal, you won't take anything.

One of the most imporant things to understand is your relationship to money. Intensely symbolic, money can represent four basic human needs: love, security, power and freedom, says Linda Barbanel, a New York psychotherapist who's often called the "Dr. Ruth" of money. In her book, Sex, Money and Power: Smart Ways to Resolve Money Conflicts and Keep Them From Sabotaging Your Close Relationships (Macmillan Spectrum, $14.95), Barbanel has defined four major money personality types: "love buyers," "keepers," "power seekers" and "freedom searchers." Most people are a blend of several types. Applying Barbanel's principles to financing a business can help you figure out which "you" is really conducting your money negotiations.

1. Self-Exam: Your Relationship to Money

2. Idea Cafe Tips

3. Web Links

4. Resources

1.Self Exam:

When money talks, what does it say about you?

1. Do your fancy offices, $1,000 suits and expensive stationery fairly shout your status?
2. Do you almost always pay full price?
3. Have you invested in risky deals, losing more than 15% of your investment?
4. Do you rarely listen to financial experts?

If the answer is yes to most questions, you're a "power seeker." Power and status compensate for feelings of powerlessness and humiliation in childhood. You may use money to control other people.

5. Do you find it hard to spend money on your business?
6. Do you pay your bills on time, or early, by check or cash?
7. Does the thought of paying interest to borrow money make you nervous?
8. Do you feel unduly alarmed at the thought of investing for 5 years or more?

If the answer is "yes" to most questions, you're a "keeper." Money is security, and you hate to part with it. It's your hedge against a tough world, and you're driven to compensate for a childhood marked by financial and/or emotional insecurity.

9. Do you tend to overspend on credit cards?
10. Do you cheer yourself up when you feel depressed by making a big purchase?
11. Do you over-tip?
12. Do you think you can "buy" people by doing favors for them?

If the answer is "yes" to most questions, you're a "love buyer." Money is love, and you probably had a lot more of the former than the latter growing up. You've confused the two ever since.

13. Do you have trouble committing to leases, furnishings, long-term relationships?
14. Do you make your investments without a broker?
15. Do you work hard for a long time, then take off and loaf for a few months?
16. Do you want no partners?

If the answer is "yes" to most questions, you're a "freedom searcher." Money equals independence. You refuse to be tied down by anything or anybody, and hate to feel you owe anybody--emotionally or financially.

2. Idea Cafe Tips

Stock up on good coffee, your favorite chocolate, as much money as you can find to put under your mattress, and some cheap old comedy movies (the kind you can't help but laugh at).

The process of getting money is sure to test your stamina, your sense of humor, and your self-confidence, so you'll need all the little comforts you can accumulate to sooth your ego and support your lifestyle.

If you're courting investors, you can count on your patience being tested beyond belief. They're in no hurry, but you're eyeing your dwindling funds, and wondering whether to bug them with another call, or wait another few days more.

If you're going after loans, you may get answers quicker, but they may not be the answers you wanted -- like they won't lend you as much as you asked for or their fees are higher than you expected.

And it could get a little tough to deal with those family dinners, knowing your spouse just wishes you'd just get a "real job" and forget this pie-in-the-sky dreaming, and your father-in-law subtly expresses that your delay in getting funds confirms what he always thought of you anyway.

But, take heart -- this process may put your psyche through the coffee grinder -- but it won't last forever. And soon you'll forget how endless it seemed because you'll be too busy making your business take wing. And you'll get the proud satisfaction of seeing previous doubters become admiring fans.

3. Web Links

National Association for the Self-Employed
Lobbying organization which offers discounts on products and services, resources and educational opportunities for members.

4. Resources

Barbanel, Linda. Sex, Money and Power: Smart Ways to Resolve Money Conflicts and Keep Them From Sabotaging Your Close Relationships. (Macmillan Spectrum, $14.95)

Maddox, Rebecca. Inc. Your Dreams: For Any Woman Who Is Thinking About Her Own Business. (Penguin: $11.95)

Mellan, Olivia. Overcoming Overspending. (Walker, $18.95)



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